I’m thankful to be ME

A lot of my friends started life out a little differently than I did. They went to college, met, fell in love, got married, had kids, breastfed, completely started out in the mother/wife role…. this is how they were raised, this is how they did things. It’s all they’ve ever known to want.


I’m different. It’s noticeable that I am different. I get questions like when did you and Gino get married. May 15, 2004. Yes, you do the math… that was 5 years ago, and *GASP* our oldest is 8. We met, got pregnant, and just grew up and learned together…. yes, the THREE of us.  The fact that I was pregnant in no way made me want to get married.  I knew that I would be getting married because I was in love.  Lucky for me it happened to be the father of my child that I decided to spend the rest of my life with.  Ella came at a much more stable time in our life.


When talks of breastfeeding are going on, I just put a smile on my face and stay out of the subject because *GASP* I CHOSE not to breastfeed. Yup, I gave my kids that horrific poison that made it so that my kids NEVER got sick until they were way past the 1 year mark. No ear infections…. EVER. Healthy and smart…. can you believe it?!?! I’ve thought about IF there was ever to be a 3rd that I would possibly breastfeed, but I know that 2 times in a row now my kids have had tremendous success on formula. Did I mention that I too was formula fed, and I too am still alive?


I will never be them. I will never be the perfect housewife, the perfect mom, the perfect stranger, or the perfect friend. My differences from my friends is obvious. I have always felt that I am different. I’ve experienced things in life that they haven’t. I’ve experienced things in life that have made me grow into who I am. I know who I am. I do not follow in the footsteps of ANYBODY.   I have created my footsteps through trial and error. My faith was not handed to me. I didn’t have the privilege of being taken to church every Sunday and being told that THIS IS WHAT WE BELIEVE.  I know that you eventually get your own testimony, but you are given the opportunity to gain that.  Nope, I got to experience *prior edited out, because it was written out of frustration…..if you were lucky enough to get here before I decided against writing it, then you know more about me than others know* things that I can look back on and say…. 

Thank you, God.  Thank you for for giving me the opportunity to find my way back to the church that I once was a part of as a very small child.  Thank you for showing me that even though all of that stuff was FUN it didn’t give me JOY.  Joy to me is something that I hold so dear to my heart, because before a couple of years ago I didn’t have joy in my life.  I was happy, but I wasn’t complete.

But I’m most thankful for the path I took to get here.  I’m thankful that I found my way and I will always be me.  Whether people like it or not, I am who I am…. and I love myself.  I know that I will never be perfect.  I’m going to do things that my friends would NEVER in a million years do.  Because I am me.  And just because I’ve grown to love something so much, I will always be ME.  I love the mistakes I’ve made, because without them, I wouldn’t be ME.  Without those mistakes Gino and I wouldn’t be a WE.  
 
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7 comments to I’m thankful to be ME

  • The Gosfam

    I am glad you are who you are NOW, and for everything that happened for YOU to be YOU NOW :) I had to laugh about your formula rant–I did breastfeed both of my daughters and that was my choice–I don't judge those who formula feed their babies. It is just a personal preference. Anyways thanks for a good laugh on that note!! It is really GREAT that you Remember who you are. Glad I have met you in the blogosphere.

  • DysFUNctional Mom

    Whew! It sounds like something prompted this outburst but whatever it was, good for you for getting this out and for being confident in yourself. We all choose different paths and those who try to make us feel badly for our choices, are simply insecure themselves.
    Good for you, LOVE this post!

  • Sarah R

    I don't think anyone has the same path in life.

    While I make the choices I make in regards to parenting, I just want to clarify that I make them for us–for our family. I would never tell someone else what to do because what works for them might be completely different.

    So many people think parenting is a pissing contest, and it so isn't! :)

  • Lea Parkinson

    Well, I don't care what you say, I think you are the PERFECT friend!

  • Chelle

    I for one? Adore you. Maybe because from reading this I can relate to a lot? But honestly? I adore you because you are you. xo honey and I am glad you became who you are today–I for one think you are amazing!

  • Carissa(GoodnCrazy)

    I choose to keep my mistakes too.

    And here's my story:
    One of 10 kids. And guess which ONE of ten was NOT breastfed.

    Yup. Me. Only me.
    And guess what?? I seem to be okay.

    I had a harder and harder time breastfeeding my kids.. if I had another (which I WILL NOT!) but if I did I wouldn't try very hard.. just make us BOTH happy.

    See ya!

  • { L }

    I also got pregnant young…I was 17. And I'm also happily married to my baby's daddy! 😉 Some families don't follow the mold but still WORK beautifully!

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