4th Myaversary ~ *Heavy Image*

Yesterday was our 4th Myaversary.  4 years ago yesterday we found out our baby girl was no longer alive inside of me.  Hardest most excruciating pain I’ve ever experienced inside.

I talk about {Mya} often.  She’s not something I’ve pushed under the rug and moved easily on with life.  She is a part of me, and she is my daughter.  A daughter I haven’t met yet, but a daughter I felt inside of me.  She was growing inside of me, she kicked inside of me, she grew into my heart while she was inside of me.

We always send off balloons to Mya to heaven every year on our Myaversary.  I don’t know why we’ve never taken pictures of the balloons we’ve sent to her before, but this year was a special balloon and we took a special trip for her.

This year I wasn’t sad like I am normally on our Myaversary.  I think it has a lot to do with the if there was a Mya, there’d be no Ella.  Mya served a beautiful purpose in mending a broken marriage.  Mya served a beautiful purpose in bring a family that was so close to be broken to knowing what we mean to each other.  Mya made a way for Ella to enter this world into a family that was a family.  A family that was loving.  A family that was stable.

Mya, I thank you every day for making our family what it is today.  And that is something to celebrate.  And this face right here, is a face of a little girl with pure joy and happiness in her heart…. and I couldn’t fathom a life without her in it.

Our trip to the Oregon coast was a fun trip, but the wind was horrible! Made it very unenjoyable for Ella, but I did manage to get this cute picture of my family

Ella spent the majority of the time screaming if I didn’t have her covered entirely in a towel to protect her from the blowing sand. Such a bummer, because the weather was BEAUTIFUL! Here’s my 2 wind blown babies.

This windblown baby loved everything about the trip…. loved the water, the wind, the birds to chase and I don’t post much about my Sophie girl… but here she is

and my wonderful husband managed to get this beautiful belly pic of me at 27 weeks pregnant with our newest baby girl that will be joining our family in December.

Then it came time to let go of the balloon for Mya ~ I found this special rose balloon, so I sent her off a Rose. You can click on the picture to make it bigger.

Our trip was quick, but it was a beautiful day. We celebrated what a beautiful little girl gave us, taught us and helped us become.

Mya,

I love you more than I’ll ever be able to explain. You will always be a special part of our lives, and we will always continue to celebrate our Myaversary. I know that you are with us, and that you watch over your little family. I know one day we will get to meet, and until that day I hope that I will continue to feel you around me.

I love you ~ Love, Mama

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