I dream of journals.  I dream of a really beautiful, expensive, perfect pen and a blank page.  I think my problem lately has been that it’s just about the blank page though.  I have struggled to actually put things down – where do I start?  I finally started my scripture journal thanks to the ridiculously amazing Red Headed Hostess.  Seriously – she is downright INSPIRING.

I’ve decided to just pick topics that I really want to learn about and dive into every scripture on those topics.  My first topic is patience, because Lord knows I need patience more than anything.  Parenting might come so easy to others, but it doesn’t to me.  I know I’m not a bad mom, but I know I’m not the best.  I struggle with patience and am grateful to know that there are many books, scripture verses and Ensign talks that will help me become what my children deserve….. an extremely patient mother.  Don’t get me wrong – I’m not so impatient my kids are unhappy… it’s just I’m not as patient as I would like to be.  AND the #1 google search that brings people to this blog is “Being a mom is hard.”  People, being a mom isn’t all rosy flower petals…. sorry!  If you happen to think that it is then you are living in denial.  It’s okay to admit that it’s hard.  It’s okay to admit that you need to better yourself ALWAYS when it comes to parenting.

I went on a little trip and chose to listen to inspiring things instead of music on my trip.  I got so much out of everything I heard, but one thing has stuck in my head so strongly – our journals, library and pictures are some of the most precious treasures that we can leave behind.  How true is this?  If we spend our life trying to learn and grow and find all sorts of quotes, scriptures and philosophical things that help us in our journey, then sharing it with the generations to come is the best thing ever.  SO – I have a new goal… I’m determined to complete a set of marked scriptures and a completed set of journals for each child of mine.  I feel like I will know in the end which scripture and which journal belongs to which child.

Something keeps coming up in a lot of my readings: who you surround yourself with is who you will become.  I keep finding quotes like this in almost everything I’ve been reading.  My favorite one is from Oprah {who I have never watched on TV except when the Twilight cast was on… weird huh?}

“Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher.”

I almost felt like God was trying to say something to me.  I sat back and thought…. I’m pretty happy with the people I surround myself around…. but then I started thinking about people I don’t hang around.  People I should be reaching out too, but instead found myself JUDGING.  YES, I found myself judging people I really don’t even know.  Even more interestingly enough is that I was judging these people right along with people I was surrounding myself around.  So, here’s a big AHA moment – if your friends are judging other people and you find yourself doing the same thing right along with them then are these friends that are more than likely going to lift you higher?  HECK NO!  These types of friends are going to be judging you on everything in your life and probably talking about it with another one of their friends {that they are judging}.  It’s sortof a vicious cycle.

I am REALLY focusing on who I am surrounding myself around.  My absolutely most favorite book EVER {The Traveler’s Gift by Andy Andrews} says this:

“I will choose my friends with care. I am who my friends are. I speak their language, and I wear their clothes. I share their opinions and their habits. From this moment forward, I will choose to associate with people whose lives and lifestyles I admire.”

Can you get any more deep than that?!  These are the little golden nuggets I want my kids to read about and apply to their life.  I’ve always been highly selective on the people I allow in my life – and people sometimes think I’m stuck up, but that’s not the case.  Unfortunately, sometimes my friends choose to be friends with people that I see as a person I would never admire nor want to be like so I choose not allow those people in my life.  I hope that my children will choose the people that they surround themselves with, because I want them to only be around people who will lift them higher.